Hey, Corners of my Mind Unite!!! Warp The Planet!

Yeah, that made no sense, but what do I care? Excuse me for not being as creative as you are, as perfect as you are. And of course you know what else I need to say to you don't you? Fuck you, actually make that Fuck him and Fuck you too! and in case you don't know what that's from that's an eminem line "You say will smith don't need to curse to sell his albumns, well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too" no clue if I got that right, but if I didn't who cares?

Well, believe it or not I'm actually in a pretty good mood, unfortunetly my body disagrees with me, I think I mentioned the fact that I have two infections coursing through my body right now, but hopefully not my blood or I'm gonna be dead in a day or two ;) Well, right now I have a huge freaken headache and I'm in one of those moods where I'd fuck anything that has legs. Or at least pretty close to it, well anyway this as I'm sure you can tell if not from your own common sense, or even your own experience than from my diction and tone. If not to bad, I could care less. I'm really far to tired to give a rats ass, unless of course I didn't like the rat in which case sure you can have his ass once I'm done with him.

You know sometimes I wonder what it'd be like to just give these writings to a pyschologist perhaps a dream specialist or even a pyschoanalyst (yeah I know they're two totally seperate fields, but they relate in my mind at least to my meaning anyway) and see what they had to say. I'd probably be told I was actually quite normal and that I had a rather healthy pysche since I wasn't denying my true feelings, either that or they'd call me a fucking loon and try and have me locked up because I'm a danger to society, and a menace to their sanity. Do I make you see the light, do I make you see myself? Do I care? Am I making any sense? Does anyone know?
Did this paragraph have any point whatsoever? Do I wish someone would tell me the answer to that? Why did I just do what I did and why tf am I continuing this asinine paragraph? Although I do have one real question, did I use the word asinine properly? Let me check... half a sec... eh, it's close enough to what I meant, I think I might have wanted to use aribtrary, something like that. I was looking for a word meaning "without logic, illogical, indicating a lack of logic".

Second off, do you want to know something sad? I use the dictionary.com site enough that even after being away from home and therefore computers for over two months I still remember that I need to go to www.dctionary.com/search?q=(insert word here) to look something up, I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but what definetly is a bad thing is the topic of my next paragraph, which for some reason I've actually decided in advance. Advance meaning at the start of this sentence, or at least around their :)

Flexibility is the topic of this paragraph, and I'd like to tell you all how, ok fuck that I can't relate it to the fresh prince of bel-air rap and I don't really want to try. Anyway, I'm not really happy to be home for a few reasons one of which is the fact that at least at camp I can strech as much as I want to, and I'm not sure how athletic or at least flexible any of the readers (assuming I have any) are so I'm not sure how much anyone besides myself will understand this, although I think it should be noted that to really understand this you'll have to be able to contort at least one body part, through flexibility. I'm not sure if anyone who's just somewhat more flexible than average gets these... pains or discomforts when they don't stretch every day, even if you're not exercising, but well I get near muscle cramps, albeit a 100x less painful than a muscle cramp is if I don't strecth my legs every day and at camp I got the chance to stretch them, and I mean really stretch them several times a day.

For those of you who don't know, I'm a partial contortionist, meaning obviously that I can contort part of my body. Meaning more specifically that I can bend my legs at the knee, so as to suck my toes and more, now I use that as an example so you know what direction my legs are bending. I can actually put my right foot behind my right shoulder, or on top of my left, and of course that means behind my head. My left foot can only go behind my head as my left leg isn't quite as flexible (although I have been trying to work on it to further its flexibility) as my right leg.

I'm also really glad to be home, because the only thing I truly missed while I was away at camp was my cat. My little tabby cat ;) Who I worried about quite a bit. I'm quite glad to be able to spend some time with him every day. I think the only other thing I really missed was being able to use a computer (and the internet). Because I have a lot of shit I like to do on the computer, for example, This. My blog, it's an important part of my life although by no means essential, it's just someplace to pour out my feelings on various subjects and let a few people know how I feel, and of course to know that "At Least I Didn't Hump". I think it's really helped me understand myself a lot better, and it is quite an enjoyable experience, or I should say that it has been quite an enjoyable experience for me. I think that I really may want to get it published sometime in my life. Not because I'm special (which of course I am! Very Very special in fact :P) but because I think I tend to write in a more open manner than most people who write about themselves do. Or at least those who do so with the knowledge that other people will read what they write. I mean while I of course don't include everything in here, the things I don't include aren't really that important, I tend to include everything, even if it isn't Exactly as it happens in here. One or two facts may be changed in some of my 'stories' but that's only to protect the innocent.

I really want some comments about this blog, not because I feel underappreicated, because if I was doing this blog for attention, I wouldn't have been doing it for so long, but because I want to know what people think of my writing style. I mean I have of course gotten some, mediocre amount of reviews, but I would truly enjoy getting more, unfortunetly right now I don't think I have the traffic to really do more than that. But alls well that ends well, ya'know? Hmm, I've been dwelling on this topic far, far to long. Which now that I look at it is only 6 or 7 lines, which for me is a really really long time. And that was some extremely juvenile writing, which I realize I've been doing all day long today. Or at least in this post. Oh well, it's not like I'm trying to write professionaly, although I am trying to write enjoyably at a respectable writing level. Even though my grammar/punctuation skills are far below par, especially for my age. Although they're really below par even if I was a 12 year old. I need to work at that at some point in my life, preferably soon.

Hmm, no real mention of camp yet in my blog, even though this is my second? or is that third post since I've gotten back, I was originally intending to post something about my camp tonight, but right now I'm not really in the mood to do so, but than again maybe I will later on in this post, assuming of course that I don't end this entry right after I finish this paragraph. However if I continue at this rate I may have to end it fairly shortly because I can't ramble on about closing it for much longer can I? Although it might be quasi-enjoyable to try and keep it going for as long as possible. But I don't think that I'd really be satisfied by such an exercise, even though I know that it is a handy skill that I may need to utilize at a later date, assuming that I have the need to write reports while acting under the influence of my vocation.

Which at this moment appears to be corporate law, at least that's what I intend to go to school for, after I finish HS anyway. I'm really interested in most legal topics and criminal law is one of the best in my mind, albeit one of the hardest. I think that I may also familiarize myself with constitutional law also, as that appeals very much to my esthetics (weird use of that word eh? But accurate for me, I find law to be beautiful in its own way).

Ok, that is so much better, just changed the radio station I'm listening to, although I don't really think I can concentrate on the blog while I'm listening to this. I went from a trance station to a hard trance station, and this shit that is on is so much faster than the other trance that it's ridiculos(sp?). And because of that unfortunetly my fingers are moving so fast that It's disrupting my chain of thoughts every couple of minutes. Alright, this is slower unfortunetly I'm tired now and done writing for at least a short while, so until I get struck by the lightning of motivation this is adieu (god that was bad... sorry :p)

Until we meet again

Zelucifer@aol.com

Argh, this freaken thing posted twice for some stupid reason, I noticed it while I was rereading some of my blog just because I was curious what my writing style looked like. And this was the first time I actually reread any of it, and I'm surprised, it's weirder than I thought it would be in some ways ;)

hey, guess what? I'm back. Back again. Tell a friend? gues who's back, guess who's back... guess who's back... I'd type out more but guess what? I'm way to damn lazy, I'm really tired right now and I'm fairly sick two, I apparantly managed to get two seperate infections while gone at camp. One of them is an infection in my left ear, the other is an upper respiritory infection, fun stuff eh? I'm really really not in the mood to have any noise right now so I think it's time to mute the tv and turn off the music. Although I am going to try and listen to this one song first to see if it helps me relax. Although I doubt it a rather large amount since my eyes are burning and I'm completely exhausted. Jesus, I feel like I'm rambling already, and not only rambling but always being redundant, and I hate being redundant. Hmmm one of the things I really hate about going to camp is not being able to use a computer, and since I haven't really used a computer for over 2 months my computer skills have gone to shit, although my typing is finally going back to where it used to be. I think I'm typing about a 100 wpm now which is only about 9 wpm slower than I typed before I left for camp. However my accuracy appears to have gone down a significant amount, and that I don't like.

I wouldn't expect anything to serious tonight to be in this post, just a need to rant a little and write some more. Ah shit coughed like a bitch, coughed some mucus up and than couldn't get it out so I almost vomited from coughing so hard and from having something going down my throat, Not a pleasant experience. Alright their was like no imagery in that sentence, yay! I have no clue why I just said that though, or even why I thought it. Although right now those two sentences are pretty much synonyms, if I think it I write it. Assuming I don't write it before I think it, which I do sometimes as some of my friends will tell you. hmm, any news of import. today? Well I did hear that one of my friends got interviewed by UPN for some school writing assignment he did which was cool, although I think it would have been more interesting if they interviewed him about the 'cult' he started. I mean that's in my opinion a much more news worthy item. Even though it is really awesome that he had the skill and ability, the talent if you will to take advantage of an opportunity like that (the school writing thing) and utilize it to his advantage so much. That'll look great when he applies to college, and it's definetly going to help him a lot since I believe he's going to a few writer's workshops that are associated with it, possibly even part of it, but I'm not sure since I haven't talked about that with him in quite a while (6 months at least). God, I'm really just enjoying sitting here typing watching my fingers go, looking on in amazement as it just sort of calms me down and lets me focus on one thing or another as opposed to a billion different things at once, I mean come on everybody needs a break once in a while. Even me, the crazy lunatic from outter space will admit to taking a break every hundred thousand years or so. Hmm, I'm debating with myself over whether or not I should include any camp stuff in here, see I'm not really sure whether or not it fits with the, I'm not sure, I don't want to call it theme, more like feel of this place. Because if I did something about camp it would probably be long, and something that no one else could relate to, which isn't a big deal to me, but it just doesn't feel right to relate more than a little bit about camp to this place, at least not right now. Now I feel like just typing about my thoughts, thinking in ways that I haven't thought in a long, long time. and remembering what it feels like to not think, to just do. To observe and watch as your body takes over and your mind rests. Which if you haven't picked up by now is what I usually do when I post here. I think it's far far better than actually thinking of what to say and while it may be quite a bit less lucid than it normally would be if I were to write like a standard (don't like that word their, but I didn't feel like using the word normal their and I was going to try and use the word par but it just didn't seem to be workable) human being. But what would the fun in that be? I mean come on, this way at least you have to think perhaps only a small, tiny bit but you actually do have to think to understand my meanings. Because like this you're actually learning or at least viewing the way I think, each individual personality trait that is revealed in this wouldn't be observable otherwise. Or at least not if I did it the other way. Hmm, that was a badly written sentence or two that I could easily fix to make it better, but I don't feel like it. I think that I want to leave it so that my state of mind tonight is more readily communicated to my viewers, all 250 of them (aka all the voices in my head). I think that's about all I have to say for the night, since I definetly don't have much of a brain left right now and well, what good is a brain without a body? and how can I have a body when I'm this sleep-deprived? Figure it out, it makes sense, or at least a mediocre amount if you think about it, long and hard ;)